Friday, March 27, 2009

My NEW Family!!!!

Alright... for many of you this is not new... but here goes.... I would like to share the BEST experience that could ever happen to anyone. I have known for about 20 + years that I had another older brother. My mother had placed a baby boy for adoption through LDS Services when she was 19 years old, this was of course before she met my dad. She told my father before they were engaged and at the appropriate time she let me and each of my siblings know about him as well. I have always been open minded about trying to find him since I knew this was one of my mother's greatest desires. My mother would have tried to find him except that she didn't want to intrude on his life in any way... I, of course, on the other hand, didn't have any problems doing that. I had searched on several different occasions in searching the date of birth she gave me, but no luck. Then on the day I went to the hospital to deliver Noah an agency contacted my mother. This day was also my oldest brother's original due date. The woman from the agency, Beverly, asked my mom if January 31st meant anything to her and she said yes. (Although this was not the date my mother gave me.) She also asked my Mom if this in any way would disrupt her life (of course it wouldn't) and if she would be open to contact from her son. Her answer was yes. Finding out that he wants to know about my mother's well being and hoping for more was a moment that I had been thinking about for a long time and at this point what I needed to get through losing Noah. What hope and excitement I had occupying my thoughts.

Long story short, we found out new information over the next few days, including his name. His name is Milan... my BIG Brother. No, really my BIG Brother.. he is 6 foot 6." As soon as we found his name I was able to find a picture on the Internet. I had such a wonderful feeling come over me, I knew it was him the moment I saw it. My mom and dad were able to meet with him when he came up to Baltimore to celebrate his wife Lauren's birthday. I was sooooooo jealous. I wanted to crash that party. What I would have given to be at that reunion.

The following week we finally met. As I pulled into his driveway I could see his son Christian at the window, rushing off to tell the family we were there. As I got out of the car I put my jacket on and out comes Milan, standing TALL.. At first I was going to get Carina out of the car seat.. but quickly headed towards him and proceeded to get the BEST embrace a person could ever have. We exchanged glances checking one another out and embraced again. Samantha proceeded to hug his legs as she first met him... it was darn cute. He helped us in carrying Carina in. As I walked through the door I remember hugging Lauren and finding a instant connection. I felt as if we had a moment where our hearts connected. I met Christian who is my eight-year-old nephew and recognized the twins, Matthew and Mark who I had found on Facebook. We had already had chatted a few times and were so excited for the day. Milan's daughter Jenny came in soon after with her husband and two beautiful children. I enjoyed holding my great nephew, Anthony.. and Alliyah was just as cute as can be. I had hoped to get to know Lauren, Jenny and the boys more, but did not as much as I would have liked to. Don't get me wrong... they are absolutely WONDERFUL... I could tell what a wonderful and spiritual family Milan has, but my time was occupied hugging and getting attention from my "BIG Brother." We had many wonderful and spiritual moments. I felt as if I had known this man forever. I felt such a connection and enjoyed every moment we were together. He made over me something "terrible"... (not terrible in my case.. it was GREAT). I felt bad for everyone else because I just was eating it up. I Love All my siblings.. Milan is a part of that now and I am forever GRATEFUL to have him and his family as a part of my life. We had a wonderful visit, wonderful food and wonderful conversations, I could NEVER in my wildest dreams ever thought about a better reunion as it was. I am so thankful to my Heavenly Father for making this Dream a reality, whether it was a prompting, whether or not it was all a timing situation.... I will be forever grateful for one of the HAPPIEST moments of my LIFE!

Wednesday, March 25, 2009

Still Sick????

Alright... just let me let loose. After I had Noah on February 20th I ended back in the ER on Wednesday, February 25th for a headache I couldn't control, aparently it was due to dehydration and my hormones being so out of wack. They helped me feel better with two bags of fluids, two nausea medicines, and morphine. They let me go with a migrane medicine and to say the least I was feeling better. Then on Friday, March 13th .... Yes FRIDAY THE 13th!!!... I went to the hospital with major back pain... it was if I was having contractions--can you say PAINFUL. When they finally took me back to a room they examined me and did a urine test which showed that I had a UTI. Then they sent me for a Open MRI to see if I had kidney stones. The results of the MRI and my blood work showed that I didn't have any kidney stones but that I do have a kidney infection!!! This is something I may have actually had since the beginning of my pregnancy, we may or may not ever know if it is the reason we lost Noah, but it is definitely a possibility. Well, I finished my medicine last week but I have been feeling worse the last few days, so I decided last night that I would call doctor today to be checked out. I went to the doctor and saw the same CRNP that I saw I after I had Noah to be put on a medicine for my depression, and she recognized me right off and wanted to know how I have been.... Of course I said I am falling apart. I let loose a bit and she said well.. take a urine test and she would be right in. I came out of the bathroom and to my suprise I realized I had blood in my urine. I just was about to fall to pieces. Can you say I HATE being SICK!!!! Rachel the CRNP reassured me we will get to the bottom of this and she will send my urine out for testing and should know something by Monday or Tuesday. She decided to put me on a diffrent antibiotic for longer so we shall see. So.. that is the lowdown on my sickies for now.

Sunday, March 8, 2009

Feb 20, 2009

A sweet little spirit
not meant to stay
A gift to our family
too soon went away
Our Noah Eugene
so delicate and new
went back to his home
his mission all through
His task was to gain
a physical frame
his spirit so valiant
needed only our name
We’ll miss you sweet son
and will wait for the day
we can hold you again
to laugh, run and play
We’ll strive for the kingdom
and meet you soon there
for eternity waits
for our family to share
Rachel... (My Sisters Friend wrote)

Noah Eugene

Well, as we can ALL see I am not a big blogger.. maybe... maybe one day.
A lot as happened since the last post.

Things were looking well with the baby. I went to my 12 week check up and heard the baby's heartbeat. The only concern was my blood pressure was a little high. I went in at my 16 week check up same thing.. but baby's heart beat was good as well.

Spencer and I decided on the 17 week mark to go and find out what we were having. We went to a Ultrasound Facility that did gender determination. The technician and I both relized the baby was not moving. I called my doctor and he advised me to go to the ER. My girlfriend Sarah and I went and they ran all their tests and advised me he had passed.

The next day I went to the OBGYN office that my midwives advised me to go to and they as well determined it and scheduled me to be induced. All doctors advised that I would need to Labor and Deliver the baby.

I was scheduled that evening/morning at 12:30 am on Friday, Feb 20th to start the induction. The doctors and nurses advised that it could be a very long labor. From start to finish could take 22 or more hours. I was very relieved that they allowed me any form of pain medicine. I decided to do stadol and about 8 hrs or so later I was about just minuets away from getting an epidural and I let the nurse know I had lots of pressure. Sure enough the baby came down and in one push she stopped me and at that point we were waiting for the doctor and the contractions had stopped and we gave birth to a little boy. We named him Noah Eugene Pechin. He was perfect. He was only 17 weeks and he was 8 1/2 inches long and weighed 4.4 oz. He was little but had all 10 fingers and toes, fingernails eyes, ears, nose, mouth and cheeks.

We are so pleased with the level of care and support from our family and the staff at the hospital. We had know idea everything was going to be such a big deal. We are very pleased it was. They took foot prints, pictures and wrapped Noah in a baby bunting and blanket and gave me a memorial box with a bracelet and a butterfly pendant. They even gave the girls a butterfly pendant and a beanie baby dog that matched the dog they gave Noah.

We are so pleased with knowledge we have that our Savior lives and the opportunity that we know that we will see Noah again. I truly believe that it may have always been his mission to come and just obtain a body. I am grateful that he gave us that chance. This is not to say that I would not rather be holding my son. I would. But, I love my Heavenly Father and I know he will help me thru my grief and I will be able to get thru this difficult time.

Thank You My Friends and Family for All of your Love and Support. I Love you All!